So, Micah Richards has swine flu.
Thankfully he's on his way to a full recovery but the discovery of him contracting the illness must have been a huge worry to his family, friends and colleagues at Manchester City as well as his gaffer, Mark Hughes.
Almost as worrying for Hughes, however, will be the England right-back's account of his illness.
"At first I thought it was a really bad chest infection, or maybe alcohol poisoning," he told The Sun.
Alcohol poisoning?
ALCOHOL POISONING?!?!
How much have you been drinking, Micah?!
Just how wasted does someone have to get in order to consider alcohol poisoning a feasible explanation for chest pains?
"I felt so weak that I couldn't move or eat. My friends had to bring me drinks in bed," he continued.
Somehow, I don't think he has learned from his alcohol poisoning worries. Although, to be fair, I'd be more worried about returning to training to face Sparky - who has, no doubt, figured out just how Micah has been keeping in shape this summer!
Ooops!
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